💸 Impulse Spending: Penelope vs. The Trolley of Doom – ADHD Shopping Survival Guide #7

Impulse spending isn’t just a money issue. For people with ADHD, it’s a full-body, full-sensory, full-emotional experience – often ending in guilt, confusion, and an overdraft that won’t stop waving from the red.

This is Penelope’s story. And if you’ve ever walked into a shop with good intentions and walked out wondering, “What just happened?”, you’re not alone.

🛍️ The Turning Point in the Kitchen

Penelope always thought of herself as “mostly sensible” with money – but in the way someone might say, “I mostly don’t eat cake in bed.”

She made lists. She meant to stick to them. But somehow, she never quite did.

One Sunday afternoon, after a particularly chaotic shop, her husband asked,
“How much did you spend?”

She froze. It wasn’t the question. It was the look that came next – that quick flicker of his eyes over the receipt, the pause, the tiny sigh. The unspoken judgement.

It hit her like a punch in the gut.
“I don’t think he trusts me,” she thought.
And worse – “I don’t think I trust myself.”

That feeling – not of being irresponsible, but of being seen as unreliable – cut deeper than she expected.

She didn’t want to be managed. She wanted to be respected.

And she realised something had to change.

🌪️ The Storm Inside the Shop

That Sunday’s shop hadn’t even started badly. She’d gone in with a list: dishwasher tablets, milk, bin liners.

But the shop was heaving. It was noisy. People were talking – laughing, arguing, hovering. The music was loud, overly cheerful. A child nearby was crying. Someone brushed past her arm too closely. Then again.

She was constantly making micro-decisions:

• Do I move to the next aisle to avoid the crowd?
• Did I already pass the cereal?
• Oh, that candle looks lovely – where would that go?
• Wait, do I need loo roll? I can’t remember now.

Every time her eye caught a new product, her attention darted. She was processing hundreds of things at once – colours, conversations, smells, textures – and it became too much.

Her nervous system was overloaded. Her logic centre didn’t stand a chance.

So her emotions stepped in.

And when that happens? You buy the soothing thing. You pick the nice-smelling one. You grab the notebook, because it feels like control. You justify the extra plant pot. You stop making decisions with your plan – and start making them with your feelings.

Penelope didn’t overspend because she didn’t care.
She overspent because her brain was in survival mode.

🎯 The Realisation: It Wasn’t About the Money

That night, after the awkward conversation in the kitchen, Penelope didn’t blame him.
She blamed the loop.

The overstimulation. The subtle self-shaming. The tiny choices that added up to overwhelm. The feeling of being swept along by something she couldn’t name – until the checkout brought her crashing back.

She wasn’t bad with money.
She just needed a new way to shop.

🐾 Penelope’s Baby-Step Battle Plan

She didn’t start with budgeting apps or strict limits. That would’ve lasted all of three days.

Instead, she made tiny tweaks to give her brain a fighting chance.

🧠 Before the Shop: Anchor, Plan, Ground

• Choose a Word
  One word to carry in, one word to carry out. Calm. Focused. Capable. Something she could feel again if things got chaotic.
• Make a List (Phone Notes Are Enough)
  Penelope kept it simple: “Milk, bin bags, dishwasher tablets.” If anything tempted her that wasn’t on it, she’d pause, take a photo, and decide tomorrow.
• Visualise the Win
  She imagined the moment she’d tell her husband the total – and him nodding, even smiling. That respect mattered more than any candle.

🎧 In the Shop: Combat the Overwhelm

• Headphones In
  Soothing music. No lyrics. Just enough to soften the chaos around her.
• Basket Over Trolley
  Less space. Fewer excuses. Physical limits for her distracted brain.
• Mid-Shop Reality Check
  She’d stop in an aisle and look in the basket. “What’s on my list? What’s not?” That moment of pause re-engaged her logic – even if just for 10 seconds.
• The Photo Rule
  If she saw something she really liked – a pretty serving bowl, a new set of pens – she snapped a photo. If it still seemed necessary tomorrow, she could come back. Spoiler: she rarely did.

💡 After the Shop: Reinforce the Victory

• Review and Reflect
  In the car, she’d glance at the receipt. And if she stuck to the plan – or even mostly stuck to it – she’d let herself feel the win.
• Name the Feeling
  “Proud. Calm. Clear-headed.” She started tracking those words – anchoring them. Because ADHD brains don’t just need reminders – they need rewards that actually mean something.

💬 More Than Money: Reclaiming Self-Trust

The shift for Penelope wasn’t just practical. It was emotional.

She started to believe in herself again.
She started to feel proud when she paid for only what she planned.
And slowly, she saw that look in her husband’s eyes change – from doubt to trust.

She still makes mistakes. ADHD is a lifelong dance. But she now has tools – and more importantly, self-compassion.

Because the real achievement isn’t just staying within budget.
It’s walking out of a shop with your dignity, your purpose – and your self-respect – still intact.

🧰 Penelope’s ADHD Shopping Toolkit

• 🎯 Choose a word to guide your trip: calm, focused, proud
• 📝 Keep a simple list (on paper or your phone)
• 🎧 Use headphones to reduce overstimulation
• 🧺 Stick to a basket – it limits impulse space
• 📸 Take photos instead of impulse purchases
• 🧠 Do a mid-shop pause: Does this match my plan?
• 🚘 After shopping, reflect: What did I do well? How does that feel?

🚀 Ready to Take the First Step?

If this story felt familiar – if you’ve found yourself overwhelmed in shops, frustrated with your impulse spending, or just tired of feeling out of control – you don’t have to figure it out alone.

I offer a complimentary 30-minute ADHD coaching session where we can explore what’s going on for you and how we might work together to bring clarity, structure, and self-trust back into your life.

No pressure. No judgment. Just support.

👉 Book a free ADHD Coaching Discovery Session today  📅and take the first step towards outsmarting ADHD Impulse Spending.

See here for 5 ADHD Money Management Strategies for Couples: How to Talk About Money Without Stress

Let’s figure out your version of freedom from the trolley of Impulse Spending doom.