As an ADHD coach, I’ve often heard clients share stories about feeling stuck under the weight of high expectations. This week, I experienced something that reminded me how real these struggles are, even for those of us who are trained to help others navigate them. Being an ADHD coach does not mean I have all the answers. I am still on my own journey. But because I also experience what my clients experience, I understand what you’re going through and have the training to help you find a way to move forward.
The Challenge of Pressure and Deadlines
I had committed to preparing a series of presentations—something I was initially excited about. At the time of agreeing, everything seemed straightforward. But as the deadlines approached, I hadn’t even started. The pressure to deliver “perfect” work mounted, and instead of motivating me, it made starting the task feel impossible.
When I finally sat down to work, my focus drifted to unrelated tasks. I became hyper-focused on perfecting something minor and irrelevant, and hours later, I was mentally exhausted without making progress on what I truly needed to do. This experience wasn’t new to me or many of my clients with ADHD. It’s a classic cycle of pressure, procrastination, and perfectionism that’s deeply tied to ADHD and anxiety.
Perfectionism in ADHD and Anxiety
Perfectionism often stems from a desire to compensate for ADHD challenges or to avoid criticism. For those of us with ADHD, tasks can feel overwhelming, and anxiety amplifies this by adding layers of fear:
- “What if it’s not good enough?”
- “What if I fail?”
- “What will people think?”
This anxiety-driven perfectionism leads to procrastination, as starting feels too daunting. When we do begin, hyperfocus on details can cause us to spend hours on something minor, leaving us drained and still far from our goals. The pressure to be perfect often makes us feel trapped in a cycle of procrastination, anxiety, and self-doubt.
Breaking the Cycle
Reflecting on this experience, I realised that the pressure I put on myself to be perfect had overcomplicated the task. Instead of asking, “How can I make this perfect?” I needed to ask, “What is the simplest way to get this done to a good enough standard?”
This shift in perspective was liberating. By enlisting the help of a colleague as a thinking partner, I was able to talk through my ideas, clarify the task, and simplify my approach. The task that had felt impossible earlier was completed in just two hours. The sense of relief was immense.
Lessons Learned
Perfectionism is a common challenge for people with ADHD, especially when anxiety is involved. To move forward, we must give ourselves permission to take the easier path. This doesn’t mean cutting corners; it means recognising that “good enough” is often good enough. Here are some strategies I’ve found helpful:
- Break tasks into smaller, manageable steps.
- Focus on completing the most important parts first.
- Work with a thinking partner to simplify your approach.
- Remind yourself that mistakes are part of learning and growth.
If you struggle with perfectionism, procrastination, or pressure, know that you’re not alone. These challenges don’t define you—they’re simply hurdles that can be overcome with the right tools and support.
Additional Resources
For more insights into how ADHD impacts productivity, check out resources like:
CHADD and
ADDitude Magazine.
Conclusion:
If this resonates with you, you don’t have to stay stuck.
Are ready to transform your life? Let’s take the first step together.